2012 Glub-glubs January through April
All Glub-glubs released to the Daily Glub-glub app that were not later re-drawn.
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Rose Glub-glubRose Glub-glubs are always smelling great and looking just as good, although they can sometimes be a bit prickly. These Glub-glubs are also a very popular parade float decoration.
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Resolution Glub-glubResolution Glub-glub goes around and makes grand resolutions all the time, stating that he will work out, lose weight, use less non-renewable energy, and promote world peace, but he never follows through on his resolutions for more than a week. For the first few weeks of January, the rest of the world joins him, but the rest of the year he's just considered crazy.
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Paperclip Glub-glubPaperclip Glub-glubs are intended to hold papers together. However, some have noticed their flexibility and have come up with other uses for them, including (but not limited to) fingernail cleaners, inexpensive earrings, projectiles and projectile launchers (when combined with Rubber Band Glub-glubs), antennas for small electronics, and unclogging devices for salt and parmesan shakers.
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Eraser Glub-glubEraser Glub-glubs are great for erasing things, especially if those things were written with pencil. Not so great if you're trying to erase spray-paint graffiti from a wall or some memory from your mind. But the pink color is still pretty cool.
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Poker Face Glub-glubIf Poker Face Glub-glub doesn't want you to know what he's thinking, then you don't know what he's thinking.
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Coat Hanger Glub-glubCoat Hanger Glub-glubs usually hang from bars in closets and keep people's clothes from falling on the ground. Some of them are great for archery bows, others are better used as weapons in hand-to-hand combat. And then there's what mature people use them for.
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Pretzel Glub-glubPretzel Glub-glubs are pretty much Breadstick Glub-glubs who got carried away at a yoga class. They are common at amusement parks, sports events, and many other places where food must be quick and convenient.
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Penguin Glub-glubPenguin Glub-glubs love to swim and are pretty good at sliding on snow as well, although there are quite a few that live in tropical conditions that don't get snow to slide on. They are almost always seen wearing a tuxedo-like outfit, but very few Penguin Glub-glubs ever wear ties.
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Domino Glub-glubDomino Glub-glubs are pushovers. Especially when there are a bunch of them standing in line for something.
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Plant Glub-glubIf it had thumbs, they would be green. Plant Glub-glub can control the growth of any plants around it, and can grow plants without seeds. It can extend its vine-like arms as far as it needs and has a Venus flytrap on its head. Plant Glub-glub is not very fast, but quite useful when it comes to not needing to go the grocery store to buy fresh pomegranates.
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Spatula Glub-glubSpatula Glub-glubs come in two types: the flipping kind and the scooping kind. Shown here is a Spatula Glub-glub usually used for flipping burgers on Grill Glub-glubs. The scooping ones are usually made out of rubber and are great for getting the last little bits out of jars and bowls. There's also the titanium-enforced bullet-deflecting type of Spatula Glub-glubs, but those are very rare.
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Soap Glub-glubRub their heads for good luck. And by good luck, I mean clean hands. Soap Glub-glubs come in all sorts of scents and colors, but that doesn't make putting one in your mouth any more pleasant. Trust me, they don't like that "lesson" any more than you do.
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Highway Engineer Glub-glubThey must think we all read backwards.
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Fan Glub-glubFan Glub-glubs hang out in a room and provide light and air circulation. You can remove the screws holding them to the ceiling so that they can walk around, but they have to walk on all fours since their fan blades are longer than their legs. Fan Glub-glubs are always trying to get installed in celebrities' houses, so that way they can be the celebrity's number one fan.
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Funny Face Glub-glubHis mom was right. He made that face too many times and it froze that way.
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Climacophobic Glub-glubClimacophobia is the fear of stairs, climbing, or falling down stairs. This Glub-glub has it bad.
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Cannon Glub-glubCannon Glub-glubs use powerful explosions to launch things really far, really fast. Typical things to launch include Bomb Glub-glubs, Cannonball Glub-glubs, and Dodgeball Glub-glubs. Just don't be around one when he sneezes. They're allergic to gunpowder.
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Certainty Glub-glubDeath and Taxes have merged. Everything certain has now been consolidated into one Glub-glub. Happy Friday the 13th!
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Top Glub-glubTop Glub-glubs come in all shapes and sizes, but all of them stay upright by spinning really fast, otherwise they fall on their sides. Some can get themselves spinning, but most need someone else to get them started, and can maintain balance indefinitely until they get distracted. We have no idea why they're called "tops." Perhaps they're always spun on top of something, or because if you can keep a top spinning on a top hat, then you're at the top of your game.
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Pie Chart Glub-glubPie Chart Glub-glubs, while often not edible, are excellent for visually representing data. They are usually accompanied by a Legend Glub-glub, explaining what the different sections of the chart represent.
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Flashlight Glub-glubFlashlight Glub-glubs are great for finding your way somewhere at night, looking behind a dresser, or hitting a Burglar Glub-glub on the head with. Most people expect to be sad when they lose a Flashlight Glub-glub, but actually they're delighted!
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Spider Glub-glubSpider Glub-glubs vary in size from less than an inch tall to full-size Glub-glubs (which are about the size of dodgeballs). All have four legs and four arms and can have anywhere from two to eight eyes (usually an even number). All can spin webs; most are plain and practical, but some have elevated it to an art form and can weave intricate portraits that will keep audiences glued. Literally.
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Easter Egg Glub-glubWhile colorful, Easter Egg Glub-glubs are not food, unless they're chocolate, in which case they are not likely to be as colorful, unless they have a colorful wrapping, which would still not be edible. They seem to enjoy playing hide-and-seek, but for obvious reasons, their "camouflage" is less than ideal for a backyard environment.
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Fried Egg Glub-glubFried Egg Glub-glubs are quite the opposite of most Glub-glubs. For most of us, the more we run, the faster we're finished, but with Fried Egg Glub-glubs, the faster they're finished, the more they run.
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Deviled Egg Glub-glubWe don't know why they're called Deviled Egg Glub-glubs, especially because most of them aren't very devilish at all (although some would claim to be devilishly handsome). Just don't let one pull a prank on you, because then the yolk's on you! (I'm sorry. That was just fowl, but egg jokes just crack me up.)
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Scrambled Egg Glub-glubThey can be all over the place, rarely all in one piece, but they're certainly light, fluffy, and tasty. Like Cotton Candy Glub-glub. Except not as candy-y.
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Hard-Boiled Egg Glub-glubHard-Boiled Egg Glub-glubs can be a bit dense. Their shells are easy to get past, but they're not much different without their shells, albeit a little more slippery.
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Pencil Sharpener Glub-glubOh, no! Did your pencil break again?! Never fear- Pencil Sharpener Glub-glub is here! With just a few twists of the wrist, your writing implement is ready to use again! Or, if you happen to find an Electric Pencil Sharpener Glub-glub, all you have to do is give it your pencil and it will sharpen it for you! Of course, all guarantees are off if you have a mechanical pencil.
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Fitness Glub-glubFitness Glub-glubs are all about working out, staying trim, eating healthy, and overall making the rest of us feel bad. They are usually quite adept at multi-tasking because there just isn't enough time in one day to do all the stuff that doctors recommend you do- even when you get up at 3 in the morning to take the five-mile mountain hike to the health food store.
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Important Announcement!Daily Glub-glub has received special recognition from the National Comic Association of America and the Android App of the Month committee, who made Daily Glub-glub the Comic App of the Month and awarded us special funding: a million-dollar prize for the development of more, better apps! Because you, the viewers, have been such a great support by downloading this app, the people here at Daily Glub-glub have decided to share the award with you! Get a code for downloading the full app for free, as well as a hundred dollars' worth of Glub-glub merchandise! Just call 1-800-APRIL FOOLS.
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Vending Machine Glub-glubIf you're ever thirsty and far from a store, just look around for a Vending Machine Glub-glub. Just insert some money, select what kind of drink you want, and hope that your bottle or can is in stock and doesn't get stuck in the machine. Other than the high price and variable operation, Vending Machine Glub-glubs are quite consumer-friendly.
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Magician Glub-glubMagician Glub-glubs always have at least one kind of "hare" in their hats. They specialize in illusions and sleight of hand, meaning that they're not actually doing the impossible feat that it looks like they're doing. Common assistants for Magician Glub-glubs are Smoke Glub-glubs and Mirror Glub-glubs. Criminal Magician Glub-glubs are bad news: they'll steal all the money you didn't know you had behind your ear.
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Mug Glub-glubMug Glub-glubs are great at holding hot liquids on the inside and displaying your personality on the outside, with such options as "World's Best Dad", "Fill This With Coffee Before Talking To Me", or "My Kid Went To College and All I Got Was This Mug". If you're on the go, find one of the Mug Glub-glub's more portable cousins, the Thermos Glub-glubs.
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Cotton Candy Glub-glubThey may be the size of your head, but if you squeeze them down, Cotton Candy Glub-glubs are actually smaller than an average candy bar, and therefore much, much better for you. We don't reccomend pouring orange soda on a Cotton Candy Glub-glub and then promptly hugging it.
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Garage Sale Glub-glubGarage Sale Glub-glubs spend a lot of time in other people's garages and driveways. They know where all the good garage sales are, who has the best bargains, and who has the best stuff. They always carry plenty of money, but rarely does a Garage Sale Glub-glub have anything larger than a five dollar bill. One Glub-glub's trash is a Garage Sale Glub-glub's treasure, but eventually it becomes trash again and they end up having their own garage sales.
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Banana Glub-glubKnock-knock. Who's there? Banana Glub-glub. Banana Glub-glub who?
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Banana Glub-glubKnock-knock. Who's there? Banana Glub-glub. Banana Glub-glub who?
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Orange Glub-glubOrange you glad this wasn't a Banana Glub-glub?
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Jetlag Glub-glubJetlag Glub-glubs typically result from long periods spent either on an airplane or dealing with airline agents. They show similar temperaments to Suger Crash Glub-glubs, Week-After-Daylight-Savings-Ends Glub-glubs, Zombie Glub-glubs, and Frankenglub-glub. They are rather slow, do not articulate well, and have the cerebral capacity of a butternut squash.
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Lightning Glub-glub
Fast, energetic, and quite powerful, Lightning Glub-glub can control lightning around him. He constantly has a stormcloud above him and hovers beneath it, crackling with energy. When Lightning Glub-glub needs to travel, he just zaps himself wherever he wants to go with a tremendous flash and bang. It is not recommended to poke this Glub-glub with a wet metal rod.
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Samurai Glub-glubSamurai Glub-glubs are the long-time rivals and sometimes allies of the Ninja Glub-glubs. The two differ in that Samurai Glub-glubs have a very strict moral code and a lot of armor, while Ninja Glub-glubs don't have either to the same extent. Because of their heavy armor, Samurai Glub-glubs are better protected than Ninja Glub-glubs, but also less agile and stealthy. Another difference is that Samurai Glub-glubs have cool moustaches.
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Pizza Delivery Glub-glubThis is the Glub-glub that delivers pizza (and sometimes garlic breadsticks) right to your door within 30 minutes unless you live on the moon or there's a lot of traffic. Odds are low of both, because there's not a lot of traffic around the moon, but if there is then you can forget a warm pizza. We actually didn't schedule Pizza Delivery Glub-glub for today, but the camera went off when he was walking through the Daily Glub-glub headquarters with our lunch, so we decided to feature him in the app instead of tip him.
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Pi(e) Glub-glubFor those of you who haven't heard, pi is a number that is about 3.14159, but its decimals keep going on forever, with no particular pattern. March 14 (3/14) is Pi Day, a day for people to make pies, eat pies, throw pies, wear pi-themed clothing, and have contests to see who has memorized the most decimals of pi. Oh, and don't let anyone tell you that the circumference of a circle is "pi r squared." Everyone knows that pie are round.
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Eye of March Glub-glubBeware him. Why, we have no clue, but everyone keeps saying to beware the eyes of March. Maybe they're just talking about a staring contest.
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Dust Bunny Glub-glubDust Bunny Glub-glubs usually live in the most hard-to-reach places and don't pose a threat to anyone until they make themselves visible, usually to guests. They aren't hard to catch, but when you grab one, its automatic defense is to reproduce by splitting into two, or sometimes three, new Dust Bunny Glub-glubs. Dust Bunny Glub-glubs most often interbreed with "hairs."
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Diagram Glub-glubDiagram Glub-glubs exist on paper and can move around on pages as well as interact with other objects printed or drawn on the paper. They can also see, hear, and talk with three-dimensional Glub-glubs not on the paper, but they cannot leave their pieces of paper unless another paper is attached to theirs. If you have a pencil while meeting a Diagram Glub-glub, you can draw things on and around it, such as a sombrero or a moustache. Fortunately for the Diagram Glub-glubs, they can wipe off whatever they don't like drawn on them. They do appreciate people who can draw vending machines.
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Tuit Glub-glubNobody knows what a Tuit is, but we do know some things about them and we do know that there are Tuit Glub-glubs. For one thing, we know that Tuits, as well as Tuit Glub-glubs, come in many shapes, but the round ones are the most valuable. We know this because many people say that they will do a job when they get a round Tuit. If you ever see a circular Tuit Glub-glub (like the one pictured here), ask it where the other Tuit Glub-glubs hang out so that we can all get a round Tuit.
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Plunger Glub-glubSomebody's got to do it.
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Power Socket Glub-glubsPower Socket Glub-glubs must get in trouble a lot, because they're usually grounded. This makes the frowney-face kind a bit more common. Like most Glub-glubs, they will hurt you if you poke them in the eyes.
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Taco Glub-glubTaco Glub-glubs are crisp, colorful, tasty, and often healthier than Hot Dog Glub-glubs. Plus, they go great with Avocado Glub-glubs and Churro Glub-glubs, two other edible examples of awesomeness. Taco Glub-glubs come in two types: soft and crunchy. Soft Taco Glub-glubs are more closely related to Burrito Glub-glubs.
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Die Glub-glubGrammar lesson: one Die Glub-glub, two Dice Glub-glubs. That's what we call a double plural, and we use it whenever we're not talking to an English teacher because it's technically not correct and it's probably not even a real grammatical term, but it sounds all official to make up a term and explain it, which is called "false officiality by term-explaining," which is also a term I just made up, and thus I complete a really official-sounding run-on sentence, which we refer to as either a "professor's nightmare" or an "epitome of the English language." Oh, yes, Dice Glub-glubs are great for making decisions when there are either more than two choices or when a Coin Glub-glub is not available.
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Viking Glub-glubViking Glub-glubs live up north and are famous for their incredible boats, fearsome fighting, and hats with horns, which they actually didn't wear until just recently. They made this transition when they found out that everybody thought their hats had horns on them and realized that it looked a lot cooler than the plain hats that they had been wearing. Viking Glub-glubs ruled the seas hundreds of years before Pirate Glub-glubs, and thus the "Vikings vs. Ninjas" debate is much older than the "Pirates vs. Ninjas" debate, although the latter certainly gets more publicity.
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Secret Agent Glub-glubSecret Agent Glub-glubs are the undercover spies sent to foil the plots of bad guys when Super Glub-glub is otherwise occupied (and he usually is). Most of them report to the GBI, the Glub-glub Bureau of Intelligence. They have all sorts of cool gadgets, from video glasses to radio pens to bomb pens (easily confused with radio pens) to wristwatches that can scan an area for enemy surveillance. When they're not staring down a criminal mastermind, you can usually find Secret Agent Glub-glubs jumping away from explosions in slow motion.
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Cloud Glub-glubCloud Glub-glubs just float around all day, soaking up water vapor from the atmosphere and growing. When they get too full, they turn grey and start dumping out excess water as rain, which is also a common time for them to sneak up on another Cloud Glub-glub and zap them with lightning. Sometimes they move lower to the ground and become Fog Glub-glubs. Cloud Glub-glubs are also great at impressions.
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Hieroglyphics Glub-glubsThese are the ancient precursors of the Number and Letter Glub-glubs, used by ancient Egyptian Glub-glubs. Hieroglyphics Glub-glubs were written mostly on Papyrus Glub-glubs, the older cousins of Paper Glub-glubs, but Hieroglyphics Glub-glubs went out of style as soon as people realized that they are hard to type on keyboards. Now, they can only be found carved on Pyramid Glub-glubs.
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Leap Year Glub-glubThese Glub-glubs only celebrate their birthdays every four years, which is a painstakingly long time for younger Glub-glubs, but well worth it once friends start turning eighty.
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Top Hat Glub-glubNote: Glub-glubs wearing top hats are smaller than they appear. Also, these roomy hats provide a great place to hide tricks, since most Glub-glubs don't have sleeves. And to top it off, Top Hat Glub-glubs just look fancy.
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Paradox Glub-glubA paradox is a self-contradictory statement or idea, and Paradox Glub-glub is full of them. He constantly quotes, explains, proposes, models, and tests paradoxes, baffling and confusing everyone around, sometimes including himself. Some favorite quotes of his are, "The following sentence is true. The previous sentence is false," and "Everything I say is a lie." Just don't ever let Paradox Glub-glub near a time machine.
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French Toast Glub-glubIt's Toast Glub-glub with a moustache, beret, and an accent.
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Umbrella Glub-glubThey can keep the rain and the sun off of you, but they don't help much with falling pianos.
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Mime Glub-glubMime Glub-glubs do not talk, but instead silently interact with invisible objects created by imagination. While often entertaining to watch while strolling through the park, Mime Glub-glubs are notorious for locking themselves in boxes and requiring the assistance of another Mime Glub-glub with either an invisible key or an invisible bazooka to get them out.
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Infomercial Salsesglub-glubBUT WAIT! There's more! We'll even throw in... this FREE TOASTER! And if you call right now, we'll DOUBLE the offer! That's right, TWO [advertised product]s, and TWO toasters- for only $19.99! Just $19.99! To order, just call 555-1234. That's 555-1234.
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Traffic Light Glub-glubIf the green light is on, go. If the yellow light is on, then slow down. If the red light is on, then stop. If the red light is flashing, treat it as a 4-way stop sign, and if a light is flashing blue and pink with yellow polka-dots, then we don't recommend driving. Sometimes Traffic Light Glub-glubs take vacations and are substituted by Disco Glub-glubs.
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Lame Knock-Knock Joke Glub-glubLame Knock-Knock Joke Glub-glub knows every single lame knock-knock joke there is, and has been known to tell them all consecutively. However, the only instances of this have been at parties where new people keep coming, because normally the audience dwindles down to zero before he tells the twentieth joke. The record for the most jokes listened to in one sitting is held by a Rock Glub-glub named Stuart, although some debate remains as to whether Stuart was actually awake the whole five hours.
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Cactus Glub-glubCactus Glub-glubs are great desert survivors (although they don't mind some dessert now and then), able to go long periods of time without water in very hot environments and in very nutrient-poor ground. This is why they make good house plants, especially for less responsible Glub-glubs.
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Graffiti Glub-glubGraffiti Glub-glubs can only move around on flat surfaces such as walls or sidewalks, much like Stained Glass Glub-glubs can only move around in windows. Graffiti Glub-glubs are not illegal because they are not actually vandalism and can inhabit a surface without permanently damaging it. Inanimate graffiti is still disapproved of, although Graffiti Glub-glubs are helpful in cleaning it up because they can just lift it up and take it somewhere else.
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Knight Glub-glubWhile the shining armor may protect you from arrows, swords, axes, and Dragon Glub-glubs, it does an equally good job of keeping more necessary things out, such as food. 9 out of 10 Glub-glubs who decide to quit being Knight Glub-glubs make the decision when they realize that they have to go to the bathroom after they had put on the suit.
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Bifocals Glub-glubThe top parts of the glasses magnify objects, and the bottom parts reeeeally magnify objects. Bifocal Glub-glub can use the art of intimidation for staring contests.
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Guitar Glub-glubWhile sometimes a little high-strung, Guitar Glub-glubs make great music, although the Electric Guitar Glub-glubs often require some sort of amplification, such as a Megaphone Glub-glub or a Subwoofer Glub-glub. Guitar Glub-glubs are instrumental to rock'n'roll and are used for a large variety of other music.
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Titanium Glub-glubTitanium Glub-glubs have the highest strength-to-weight ratio of any metal, meaning they are very strong for their weight. They also do not rust, which makes them the ideal Glub-glubs for many tough tasks, such as going to space or holding a submarine together.
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Imaginary Glub-glubThis Glub-glub is only as amazing as your imagination.
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Broccoli Glub-glubMany sources will say that Broccoli Glub-glubs are pretty much the edible flowers of Cabbage Glub-glubs. However, most third-graders will contest this statement on the grounds that Broccoli Glub-glubs are not edible. There is still a large debate as to whether this green thing would still be considered edible if dessert were no longer at risk.
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Walrus Glub-glubWalrus Glub-glubs often live in far northern and far southern climates, where thick layers of blubber protect everything except their legs from the frigid waters. They have impressive moustaches and the perfect dental structure for making kabobs.
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Matryoshka Glub-glubsThey're quite simple: pop the top off, and you find a smaller one inside. Repeat with the smaller one until you find the smallest one in the middle. Very rarely is the largest one in the middle, because he doesn't fit inside the smaller ones. And the smallest one is rarely on the outside, either.
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Chili Pepper Glub-glubChili Pepper Glub-glubs can pack a punch, although some are quite mild. Supreme spiciness isn't for everyone, though. If you have a sensitive tongue, then the Bell Pepper Glub-glub tolls for thee. If hot makes you happy, say hello to a Jalapeno or a Habanero Glub-glub. And as for the Ghost Pepper Glub-glubs, well, they're so spicy some people don't even believe in them.
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Tornado Glub-glubTornado Glub-glubs are rapidly spinning masses of air, dust, and water. They are very loud and thus very hard to talk to. Sometimes they can zap you with lightning and have been known to hurl Cow Glub-glubs into the next town. That said, try to avoid Tornado Glub-glubs if you see them.
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Detective Glub-glubDetective Glub-glub is the Glub-glub to go to if you have a mystery to solve. Cunning, observant, and a master of deductive reasoning, there are few mysteries Detective Glub-glub can't solve. With his magnifying glass and bubble pipe, he's ready to tackle mysteries of all levels, from local robberies to international secret societies to why the chicken really did cross the road.
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Realistic Features Glub-glubThis is not a more detailed picture of a Glub-glub. This is a picture of a more detailed Glub-glub. All pictures of Glub-glubs shown on this site are as accurate as possible; in fact, most are indiscernable from photographs except to a trained eye, but no photographs of Glub-glubs have ever been released to the public, so we don't expect you to know the difference anyway.
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Toaster Glub-glubA Toaster Glub-glub is capable of turning any regular Bread Slice Glub-glub into a Toast Piece Glub-glub, although Toaster Glub-glubs do not provide butter or jelly. Also, if you're not a Bread Slice Glub-glub, you can put your feet into the two slots, the Toaster Glub-glub turns off the heat, and then launches you into the air using its spring-loaded bread holders.
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Science Glub-glubWith beakers for feet, a robotic arm with a microscope, and an atom for an eye, Science Glub-glub is capable of performing any type of scientific experiment and can figure out pretty much anything that can be figured out scientifically. He often will require a Calculator Glub-glub or a Computer Glub-glub to analyze data, but if there are data to be collected, this Glub-glub can collect it.
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Blend-In Glub-glubLike a Chameleon Glub-glub, Blend-In Glub-glub can change its skin pigmentation to match whatever is behind it. However, this disguise only works from one direction. Unlike Chameleon Glub-glubs, Blend-In Glub-glub can change color quite rapidly but does not have independantly moving eyes or a long tongue.
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Protist Glub-glubA Protist Glub-glub is pretty much any microscopic Glub-glub that doesn't fit into any other category, such as plant, animal, bacteria, or fungus. All have a nucleus, some can do photosynthesis, some are multicellular but don't have tissues, but all of them have some trait that makes them not fit anywhere else. Some examples are Paramecium Glub-glubs, Kelp Glub-glubs, Algae Glub-glubs, and Amoeba Glub-glubs.
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Mirror Glub-glubMirror Glub-glubs are great friends because they are brutally honest about how you look and can truly help you see yourself for who you are. Unless it's one of those warped ones at the circus, in which case you can't tell if it's saying you're too fat or if you have a grotesquely giant nose. One thing goes for all Mirror Glub-glubs: they never lose a staring contest. They never win one, either.
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Caveglub-glubBy definition, a Caveglub-glub is any Glub-glub that lives in a cave. However, most of them are quite robust after a few years away from a fast-food restaurant. Sometimes they venture into society, but usually only when they've gone a few years without a double-bacon-cheeseburger. They are not prone to violence and often only use their clubs to tenderize steaks.
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Match Glub-glubThey're pretty much just Toothpick Glub-glubs with a pile of chemicals on their heads. Some have special tips that allow them to light anywhere, others require a box in order to catch fire. How come it only takes one careless Match Glub-glub to light a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to light a campfire?
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Padlock Glub-glubPadlock Glub-glubs come in a variety of shapes and sizes. Some have knobs on them that must be turned a certain way before they unlock, others require a password, and some just recognize whose stuff they're keeping locked up. They don't like Burglar Glub-glubs very much.
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Slow-Motion Glub-glubThis Glub-glub is always in slow motion, which makes awesome action scenes easier to film, but is pretty annoying for about everything else.
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Holographic Glub-glubHolographic Glub-glubs are not real Glub-glubs, but merely 3-Dimensional images of a Glub-glub somewhere else. Holographic Glub-glubs can walk around, talk, and interact with others as if they were actually there, but since they are not actually there and represented only by light, they cannot feel, touch, or lift anything, so punching a frequent caller would be futile.
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Moustache Glub-glubA fancy moustache is the key to... well, we're not sure exactly what, but it certainly isn't the key to being inconspicuous. Unless you're at a Fancy Moustache Convention, and there are no recorded instances of those in any history books, so don't have a big moustache if you want to go unnoticed.
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Giant Glub-glubGiant Glub-glubs vary in height, but in order to be classified as one, a Glub-glub must be taller than three feet, as an average Waka-waka is about two feet tall. Most Giant Glub-glubs are from five to seven feet tall, while some are truly gigantic, the largest ever being 20 feet tall. They are very useful in skyscraper construction, but find getting on airplanes quite frustrating.
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Procrastinator Glub-glubThese Glub-glubs' motto is, "Why do today what you can put off until tomorrow?" They won't do anything unless the deadline is either today or tomorrow, and even then have been known to wait to write a paper until the lunch break before the class in which the paper is due. Some Superstitious Procrastinator Glub-glubs are afraid of Saturday the Fourteenth, and their name is not one you want to write often.
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Superstitious Glub-glubTriskaidekaphobia is the fear of the number 13. Add Frigga, the Norse goddess from which Friday gets its name, and you get friggatriskaidekaphobia, the fear of Friday the 13th. This Glub-glub has bad cases of both.
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Braces Glub-glubIf a Glub-glub has poorly aligned teeth, then they often temporarily become Braces Glub-glubs in order to fix their smile. As much as they might tell you otherwise, they do NOT count as Cyborg Glub-glubs.
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Digest Anything Glub-glubDigest Anything Glub-glub can eat and digest virtually anything he can fit in his mouth. However, he rarely does eat anything inedible because nobody in their right mind would eat a slab of concrete when it costs more and is less convenient than a bag of chips. He says that concrete tastes like very dry and stale chicken. On the plus side, whenever the neighbor kids make him a mud pie, he actually eats it in front of them, unless there are worms in it. He doesn't like worms.
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Hover Glub-glubThese Glub-glubs do not have any legs, but instead always hover about seven or eight inches above the ground. This means that they never use energy for walking or running, never trip and fall, and can never reach their keys when they drop them.
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Resume Glub-glubThis is the best Glub-glub to have with you if you need to get a job. They record your achievements and present them to Businessglub-glubs, who use this information to decide if they should hire you. Just be sure they don't start with, "Dear sir or madman."
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Left-Hand-Drawn Glub-glubNo offense to any lefties or ambidexterous people, but this is our result of subtracting one right hand and adding about 30 seconds of drawing time.
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